SPIRIT's Diary

 In pre-article, I introduced Kaishu Katsu's quote, "It's meaningless if we hurry up. Waiting with lying down is our first priority." But, more thinking, I'm not good at waiting. Today too, not having learned my lesson, I paid money for PixAI. There was an animation that I want to make by any means. But, inversely, I can act aggressively. As new customers of our workplace, I've been interested in LGBTQ recently. So, today, II devoted money for one of LGBTQ group and became a supporting member of it. I prefer yuri, but yuri and LGBTQ are different, so I have to learn about LGBTQ more,, such as books。 However, even a bit, I have to learn ability I can do "waiting", such as saving money. I've understood that I want to spend money for the society..

Recently, I've spent impatient days every day. Because I don't have sufficient cash and I can't invest such as equity and social-lending whatever I want. And I'll go to Germany with my father. I don't understand how much we will use money on-site, and I can't predict how much cash will remain. So I don't know amount of money for investing, so it makes me irritated as an investor. And, in November, I'll take colonoscopy. I almost drink liquor every day, so I wonder how much mucosa of digestive tract have been harmed. I also don't know how much expense of this examination. Shouldn't I become impatient? Kaishu Katsu said, "It's meaningless if we hurry up. Waiting with lying down is our first priority." Is this saying true? Someday, my cash for investing will collect, so shouldn't I be impatient? Anyway, at first, I have to save money more. Of course, paying for PixAI is strictly inhibited. To contribute the society, I want to resta...

Yesterday, while I'm thinking about how to live in German travel, without introspection, I paid 700 yen for PixAI again.  To take back it, I collected all interest money, of fixed deposit for German Travel.  I spent for it much time, but the result is 350 yen. In Funds(https://funds.jp/), the homepage of social-lending(crowdfunding)), we can invest 1 yen at a time, so I invested this money for Funds. It's also important for me to get benefit, but will my investing money make society useful? I said, that it's likely to in December that I can restart to invest of equity. But, about Funds that we can invest 1 yen at a time, it's more useful than buying equity in Paypay Securities. I may should use Funds more.

I have always told myself, “Politics and the economy are not things I can do anything about by myself. All I can do is focus on what I am capable of doing right now.” And yet, look at the mess I have made of things this month. “I couldn’t stop myself from overspending on PixAI, nor could I control the money I wasted on overeating and excessive drinking. In the end, I even had to sell some of my stocks just to cover my credit card payments. That goes against the principles of dollar-cost averaging, and it also goes against my own belief in contributing to society through investment. I’m really disappointed in myself.” Recently, I have often been calming myself down by listening to The Song of Hakaider while carefully looking at the group illustrations I commissioned from that artist: “The Hakkenshi of the Harem Protagonists” and “The Hakkenshi of the Girls und Panzer Captains.” (I mean the versions in which each of them is showing their spirit bead.) Apparently, though, even that is not...

In the end, I couldn’t rein in my excessive spending on PixAI or the money I was wasting on alcohol, so I reluctantly decided to sell some of my shares. Since they’re worth more than I originally paid, I suppose it counts as taking profits. (I didn’t buy them through a NISA account, so some of the proceeds will go toward taxes.) For the moment, I can rest easy because I’ve kept the money for my trip to Germany in a time deposit. Still, I can’t let my guard down when there’s no telling how much fuel prices may rise. I was born during Japan’s economic bubble, in a country that had remained at peace since the Pacific War. Even now, as the number of working poor continues to rise in Japan, people like us still maintain a reasonably high standard of living. I ought to give back as much of that good fortune as I can, but my own weaknesses make it difficult. Even if I tried to give back through physical labor, my mental endurance is far below that of most people. (If I were told to clear rubb...

Yesterday, I met peers of developmental disorder. But when returning home, I wasted money again, for both paying PixAI and buying liquor. So I became very depressed. I'm always thinking, I'm thinking that can I do something about these much wasting? Honestly, animations generated by PixAI are fun. Today, it just hit me. I often go to art museums, such as Miyagi Art Museum. But it's been rare that i appreciate arts, except Okamoto Taro, Pablo Picasso's opuses and so on. I go to other arts at once after I see one art I should watch arts more closely. I'm requesting illustrations to one illustrator by paying money. To relieve my stress without paying money, I have to watch his illustrations more closely. I love Nansou Satomi Hakkenden, and made him illustrate Hakkenden-related illustrations. I have to watch more closely. To relieve my stress, I changed wallpapers of my iPhone and PC. Of cource, the wallpaper was Hakkenden-related illustrations. I'm volatile and hot...

Recently, I've continued to spend the depressed days. Because I still couldn't stop paying for PixAI, AI illustration and anime generating system, too much, and still couldn't stop drinking alcohol. In church, about this, I consulted to the foreign pastor, and he prayed for me. It's thankful I took alcohol too much, so today too, I did watery diarrhea and depressed emotion. I went to the gastroenterology, and decided to take endoscopy and colon examination in November. My colon is likely to be hurt too much by alcohol. I should have had many things that I want to do, such as  "I want to watch various things of Japan and the world" "By investing, I want to contribute the society." "I want to inform Japanese culture such as Hakkenden to foreigners." However, like Myojin Yahiko in Rurouni Kenshin, it's true, "For it, I've done nothing" "For it, I've built nothing." Now, I don't have sufficient cash to invest...

I decided to go to Kinosaki Onsen next November or January. I went to Onodera Onsen in Yamagata and very impressed to old-fashioned hot spring town. So I want to go to old fashioned hot spring town again. We can't use credit card in most of Onodera Onsen Inns, so I want to stay in a inn which I can use credit cards. Therefore, I was singled out Kinosaki Onsen, which many foreigners have paid attention to. I've not decided amount of budget for Kinosaki Onsen Travel. But I've being adjusted that I'll stay for 3 nights 4 days. I want to stay an old-fashioned inn, but are there any vacancies in Inns of Kinosaki Onsen? I have to collect save money more.

Finally, I could collect 800,000 yen, the budget for German travel. But departure tax in Japan rose into 3,000 yen, so I'm likely to need more money. My received income every month is about 196,000 yen. In other, there are dividend of equity and social-lending, and income for hedge selling, but they're indeterminate and their amounts are unstable. So I have to make ends meet from 196,000 yen. As a pharmacist and an investor, I decided to manage and contribute the society. And I want to watch various places of Japan and the world. About excess paying for PixAI, by using the website blocker, I'm likely to resolve this problem. I want to decrease paying for PixAI more, and I want to invest such as equity more instead. Once, in Japan, it occurred agenda, that we need 20 million yen for husband and wife after retirement. But I've invested such as equity, iDeco and so on. About after my retirement, I think it's leave it to heaven. If I can contribute the society and watch...

In this Tokyo travel, expense was within the budget. But what should I use the rest money? I want to become for the good of society and others, I also want money, I want to watch various places of Japan and the world and so on... Like this, I have greed too much. When I consult Chat GPT about making physical strength for German travel, It recommended me to reduce my weight into about 98kg. It seems that BMI=35 is severe obesity, so I need to lose 5-10kg. Particularly, I need to reduce taking alcohol. Such as investing more money and so on, I have many duties, but, at first, it seems that I need to lose my weight. I need to abstain to buy food and alcohol in convenience stores, and it's also meaning of saving money. I always feel sleepiness in the day and buy Tokucha, the green tea of Suntory, but I need to settle for coffee in my home instead. I have sufficient money for German travel, so I need to save more money and invest the stocks instead.

I'm continuing to hedge selling, and thinking about what is wasteful? hostess club, brothel, gamble and so on? I've not done them. But it's nothing more to say, that it's luxury both staying the hotel able to watch Rainbow Bridge and going to Germany. Mr. Kuramoto Sou said we say good-bye to wasteful. But, on other hand, Horiemon(Horie Takafumi) says he's a far more wasteful than others. Horiemon says we should collect own experience not money. I should apply to Horiemon's theory. I have to pay money for travel, not using money for hostess club, brothel gamble and so on. And I also want to go to Sapporo Snow Festival again. Of course, for it, I need money. I said, I'll apply the theory of DIE WITH ZERO and Horiemon, that we should collect own experience not money. 

Today, I got my payroll. So I gave offering for my favorite church, and I bought equity of NIKE with 1,000 yen. However, I'm feeling it's insufficient. I have little cash, but I don't have intention to give up the hotel room able to see Rainbow Bridge in Odaiba. What should I do collect the cash? I'm trying to continue hedge selling. I won't return into "Hinkou（貧幸）/poverty and happy" which is said Mr. Kuramoto Sou. I'm continue to think Hinkou is contradiction of words. My father said own health is more important than money. However, to get medications, supplement and so on and go to hospitals, we also need money. Anyway, by getting more money, I intend to both make my dream come true and contribute the society. Should I invest my rest cash for equity?

Recently, my father bought a translation device of Sourcenext. So I’ve continued to take English conversations with my father by using it. However, the translation device can’t read my English very well. So I’m struggling to continue English conversation. Is my pronunciation no good? We can't improve English ability if we don't use English, but I've become depressed if I can't inform correct English to the translation device. This is one of my barriers. The other barrier is saving money. Today too, I went to convenience store and waste for Famichiki and Tokucha. And today too, I paid for PixAI, AI illustration and AI animation generating system. My impulsive personality hasn't changed yet, and I'm very troubled for defense of money and saving. I took paid leave for going Tokyo, but do I have to give up staying expensive hotel? If not the hotel, I can't watch the sea of Odaiba. My last hope is dividends of equities. I think I'll get over 30,000 yens as di...

I'll go to Germany on October with my father. But sufficient money hasn't been collected yet. In my case, I have a bad habitancy, that I intend to use deposit if excess deposit remains. This habitancy also hasn't changed yet. Now, I always think what equity I should buy from my deposit despite my insufficient deposit. I've made it a habit to estimate money for German travel to fixed deposit. Anyway, always, I just want to snack on something, so I waste money for snacks and liquor. I decided to watch this video about department stores in Showa era if such time comes. In Showa era, entertainments are a far fewer than present era. But people were living hard despite high birth and death rates. Only once in a year, my mother also went to the department store in Kamogawa when she was a child but my father hadn't gone to department store when he was a child, I heard. There may be many things that I have to learn from this era. Entertainments and values of people have dive...

In PixAI, we can generate animations with voice, including NSFW animations.  But I’ve spent money too much for it.  In this month, I've spent over 5000 yen. I said one of my strong points is action-oriented. But this personality backfired on me in this time. AI animations we can made in PixAI are useful, so I'll publish new AI animations in Youtube soon. But I'm impatient, and is it that I'm not good with money? I'll go to Tokyo in June, but should I stop staying in Hotel Grand Nikko Daiba? My habitancy that I eat too much when I have stress has never gone.  if I’m as I am, will I become bankrupt?

In October, I'll go to Germany with my father. But now, I'm struggling to collect money. It's last-minute planning, that I collect money after I applied travel tour. At any rate, I've collected half money of expense. But I couldn't stop small wasting, such as eating and liquor. Should I rely on dividend of my equity, or sell gold or bitcoin? In my case, my cash is always barely. I also think for the benefit of society, but I want to broaden my vision by going to various place at first. Going Germany is one method. I become easily mad if I rely on only passion and guts, so I have to maintain my pace, in the saving money case too.

In New Year Holiday Season, I need money variously. And to renewal the qualification of Japan Expert-Master of Health Literacy, I needed over 7,000 yen. So, I have no sufficient money to invest. In my honest opinions, I want to invest stocks more. It's also important for me to get revenue, but I contribute Japanese society by investing at first. And I also pay the tax by it. Particularly, I want to invest IT stocks, such as NTT, SoftBank Group and so on, and activate Medical DX. Recently, my money to eat and drink and drink liquor has increased. Every morning, I'm very sleepy, and often drink Monster, the energy drink. It's OK for me if I can reduce money to eat and drink. Anyway, I have to bear to pay life expense.

I applied for a tour-pack for German Travel in next Oct. But I've not collected sufficient money yet. It's 400,000 yen to go. It's OK if I can save 50,000 yen every month. However, my mother recommended that I should save 200,000 yen as the defense of living, not for German Travel. But I've adopted the theory by DIE WITH ZERO or Horiemon/Mr. Horie Takafumi below: "We have to collect our own experience, not money." I can't think, that it's meaningful if I save cash without purpose. Do I need 200,000 yen as saving money? Anyway, I'll ABSOLUTELY and DEFINITELY collect the rest 400,000 yens for 8 months, for German travel. I also have to broaden my vision and collect my experience.

Because of wasting for buying in the convenience stores and so on, my cash is likely to become gone completely soon. Perhaps, I may not be able to pay credit card payment in next month. It seems I've not changed since young age. It's important for me how to use money more than saving money. In this age and times, I've been able to go to many foreign countries, such as Thailand, Singapore and so on. But some people may think about, "It's the short-term luck of the ferocious people who can't control own." Actually, I can't deal with it if I need emergence expense. But, there is the way to resolve it, such as selling my equity. Like Ushijima, it's good if I can say, "I'm giving all with admitting the risk."

I always think I have to become thin when I watch my swollen body. So I changed the snack from Famichiki to chicken protein bar. After I decided to go to Germany, I often watch this story of Doraemon. But it's first time for me to watch Mizuta Wasabi's version. As always, it's not easy for us to save money. Can I reduce amounts of alcohol? Recently, I can't receive 9% Chu-hai 1000ml. When it's about 750ml, I always vomit. It's on account of my age, isn't it? Anyway, I want to go to Germany. I also have to think my mutual funds to cash.