SPIRIT's Diary

Yesterday, I went to the travel agency with my father. And we paid remaining balance for German travel, by credit cards. (By the way, after it, for 40 minutes, I had to walk to my father's favorite restaurant for lunch, it made me very perspiring and irritated. So I drunk liquor in this day.) However, I re-confirmed my household budget and balance when I had returned home, and I found my cash is insufficient for paying credit cards. It's about 70,000 yen insufficient. If it goes on like this, I have to sell my equity more again. In this month too, I paid money for PixAI excessively and also hadn't taken into account for insurance of the travel. Perhaps, they've become bad. For the good of society, I've continued to invest and buy equities, but it's a very mess like this. As soon as possible, I have to stop to pay money for PixAI and liquor. However, my personality is impulsive and not good at putting up. So I consulted Chat GPT about how to overcome my impulsive...

Yesterday too, I paid money for PixAI excessively. It was over 5,000 yen. At this rate, can I pay expense for German Travel? And can I make ends meet? The value of merchandises has continued to rise. ` If I'm not careful, I have to sell equity more with violating regulations of my investment, My deficiency that I can't "waiting" such as saving and bearing buying unneeded merchandises is showing obviously. It's no use crying over spilled milk. Including expense for German travel, what should I do for my next life expense? If it's insufficient, do I have to sell my equity more? For the benefit of all, I've continued to invest for equity, social-lending and so on, but It's putting the cart before the horse. What should I do deal with my impulsive personality and my life expense?

Recently, I've spent impatient days every day. Because I don't have sufficient cash and I can't invest such as equity and social-lending whatever I want. And I'll go to Germany with my father. I don't understand how much we will use money on-site, and I can't predict how much cash will remain. So I don't know amount of money for investing, so it makes me irritated as an investor. And, in November, I'll take colonoscopy. I almost drink liquor every day, so I wonder how much mucosa of digestive tract have been harmed. I also don't know how much expense of this examination. Shouldn't I become impatient? Kaishu Katsu said, "It's meaningless if we hurry up. Waiting with lying down is our first priority." Is this saying true? Someday, my cash for investing will collect, so shouldn't I be impatient? Anyway, at first, I have to save money more. Of course, paying for PixAI is strictly inhibited. To contribute the society, I want to resta...

Yesterday, while I'm thinking about how to live in German travel, without introspection, I paid 700 yen for PixAI again.  To take back it, I collected all interest money, of fixed deposit for German Travel.  I spent for it much time, but the result is 350 yen. In Funds(https://funds.jp/), the homepage of social-lending(crowdfunding)), we can invest 1 yen at a time, so I invested this money for Funds. It's also important for me to get benefit, but will my investing money make society useful? I said, that it's likely to in December that I can restart to invest of equity. But, about Funds that we can invest 1 yen at a time, it's more useful than buying equity in Paypay Securities. I may should use Funds more.

On Saturday, I went to see my psychiatric counselor and talked with them about my excessive spending on PixAI. Then on Sunday, perhaps because it was the end of the month, my regular allotment of PixAI credits came in. By Monday, I had used them all up, but I did not buy any additional credits. The question is whether I can keep this up. One important key to my excessive spending on PixAI is this fact about myself: "I am a devoted hime-danshi - a male fan of yuri - and yuri excites me more than it does most people." When I opened up to my counselor about this, they advised me: "Couldn't you go to a store and buy books like that instead?" I sometimes find digital copies of that kind of doujinshi (the so-called "thin books") online, but they still do not quite satisfy me. Anyway, once my regular credits came in, I resumed generating "a yuri anime featuring Yukime and Ritsuko Takahashi from Hell Teacher Nube," and I also resumed generating ...

“I realized that I'm a hime-danshi—that is, someone whose heart races for yuri more than most people.” Once I realized that, I somehow thought I had found a breakthrough that might keep me from overspending on PixAI. And yet yesterday, I went and overspent on PixAI again. I haven't learned my lesson at all. On top of that, I heard from the travel agency yesterday, and perhaps because of the recent turmoil in the Middle East, I found out that the fuel-related charges and travel costs will be higher than I expected. At this rate, in the worst-case scenario, I might have to sell even more of my stocks. (As for social lending [crowdfunding], I can't liquidate it until a certain period of time has passed.) The AI animation I had PixAI generate after, once again, overspending on it was: “Yuri between Kaoru Kamiya and Megumi Takani from Rurouni Kenshin.” This one, too, was something I came up with “just going with the flow,” and had generated “just going with the flow,” I guess. (...

Yesterday, I met peers of developmental disorder. But when returning home, I wasted money again, for both paying PixAI and buying liquor. So I became very depressed. I'm always thinking, I'm thinking that can I do something about these much wasting? Honestly, animations generated by PixAI are fun. Today, it just hit me. I often go to art museums, such as Miyagi Art Museum. But it's been rare that i appreciate arts, except Okamoto Taro, Pablo Picasso's opuses and so on. I go to other arts at once after I see one art I should watch arts more closely. I'm requesting illustrations to one illustrator by paying money. To relieve my stress without paying money, I have to watch his illustrations more closely. I love Nansou Satomi Hakkenden, and made him illustrate Hakkenden-related illustrations. I have to watch more closely. To relieve my stress, I changed wallpapers of my iPhone and PC. Of cource, the wallpaper was Hakkenden-related illustrations. I'm volatile and hot...

Recently, I've continued to spend the depressed days. Because I still couldn't stop paying for PixAI, AI illustration and anime generating system, too much, and still couldn't stop drinking alcohol. In church, about this, I consulted to the foreign pastor, and he prayed for me. It's thankful I took alcohol too much, so today too, I did watery diarrhea and depressed emotion. I went to the gastroenterology, and decided to take endoscopy and colon examination in November. My colon is likely to be hurt too much by alcohol. I should have had many things that I want to do, such as  "I want to watch various things of Japan and the world" "By investing, I want to contribute the society." "I want to inform Japanese culture such as Hakkenden to foreigners." However, like Myojin Yahiko in Rurouni Kenshin, it's true, "For it, I've done nothing" "For it, I've built nothing." Now, I don't have sufficient cash to invest...

From yesterday, I began to play Claude Code authentically. But, I've not known about what I can do. I've continued to do hedge-selling of JR East equity. However, last time, I've failed it and lost about 30,000 yen. So that I can do hedge selling more successfully, I tried to make app about fluctuation of JR East by Claude Code. This is the display. It's thankful for me to just make app, but it seems it's immature. By myself, I need predictive vision of JR East equity. More thinking, I made PowerPoint about introducing Hakkenden, but it was immature such as having some text garbling. However, we can evolve these systems. It's up to my ability whether I can improve opuses by Claude Code. Anyway, to improve my ability of Claude Code, I have to continue to use it more occasionally.

Since long time, I’ve forgotten my ambition, that I’ll contribute the society as a pharmacist and an investor. I have to spend money for investing more. But. I have to go to Odaiba for travel and use much money. And, I also have to be prepared 800,000 yens as budget for German travel despite understanding its luxury. The travel of Odaiba is soon. After Odaiba’s travel, should I think about budget for my investing? At any rate, today, I bought equity of Sumitomo Pharma. Sumitomo Pharma will sell iPS cells medication for Parkinson's Disease soon. This medication name is "AMCHEPRY (Active ingredient: raguneprocel)" Will AMCHEPRY be able to remedy Parkinson's Disease effectively? I have to not forget to contribute the society as a pharmacist and an investor.

Recently, I renewed the qualification of Popularization Certified Instructor of Japan Expert-Master of Health Literacy, derived from Japan Master of Health Literacy Test Association. I felt comfortable, but I variously feel my limit. As always, I'm struggling studying G Certificate. Over and over, I'm feeling I don't go well with knowledge of related-computer. And, in my company, I wanted to do as the brain, but as the brain too, I'm also feeling my limit. I can't catch up evolution of AI system such as Chat GPT, Gemini and so on. And about knowledge of contraindication of medications, my president is a far superior to me. What am I? I should do them as a pharmacist and investor, shouldn't I? My strongest point in my company may be only English. I may need to make my pharmacies suitable to foreigners. For it, I have to struggle to come up methods to attract foreigners. Once again, I'm likely to need to consult ChatGPT. Recently, I have no goal and am waverin...

For society and other people, I've assumed that I have to buy equities more. (It's also important to earn money effectively) But I also want to make my desire come true. More thinking about it, the level of hotel I stay have elevated steadily. In June, I'll go to Ueno to watch NHK 50th Sunday Exhibition, but I try to stay in Grand Nikko Tokyo Daiba.     When I was young, I thought I'm OK if I even sleep crowd together. But I've become old and my physical strength has weakened, so time I stay in the hotel has increased correspondingly. My father was more vigorous than me when we went to OSAKA Expo 2025.     I've applied to the theory, "It's more meaningful for us to use money and we should money for the best memories." So I want to stay the skyscraper of Grand Nikko Tokyo Daiba and watch the view of the sea of Daiba.     I've understood it's too luxury to developmental disorders. But I think that I stay true...

I decided, that I'll manage as a pharmacist and an investor, for society. I have to re-confirm my stance as an investor. ・To earn money effectively. ・To contribute society. ・While I'm at it, to pay tax. ・I won't invest for Black Company（日本語：ブラック企業） which make employees karoshi. I decided to invest for prosperity of the companies and contributing society. So I don't want to invest for Black Company which makes employees karoshi. In this point, Ajinomoto has been enthusiastic for renovation how to work, and ascend its earning of company. I recommend beginner of equity investor, which straying which company they have to buy, the stock of Ajinomoto, And I want to recommend my parents to buy equity of Ajinomoto, but they are enthusiastic to buy bank-related equities. ・I don't sell equities unless in great circumstances. With Dollar Cost Averaging, I've bought equities with same money every month. I decided not to sell, unless in great circumstances such as insufficie...

Yesterday, I went to Funaoka for hanami.  However, fully-blossomed time has been passed, so passengers of train was very few. And most of cherry blossoms in Funaoka had been scattered. It was profanity because I brought my favorite ramen and hamburgers of McDonalds. I wanted to watch Hitome Senbon Sakura（日本語：一目千本桜） in Funaoka, but, in the middle way, I felt strong bowel movement, so I went to Aeon near from Hitome Senbon Sakura. This Aeon was run-down, but I’ve thought, that it was gorgeous shopping center in the past and many people had come to it.  What should I do for renovating this Aeon? Should I buy equity of Aeon? By the way, as an investor, I'm always thinking what equity I should buy for society. I’m troubled where I should invest for.  I’m being troubled, that I have to invest for one and I have to also invest for another. After returning from Aeon to JR Funaoka Station, I had become completely tired. And it was too hot.  So, earlier, I returned to Sendai C...

Recently, I often feel to want to eat Billy Ramen by Uber Eats when I'm doing my task in work from home. But it needs about 3000 yen. Yesterday too, I wanted to eat Billy Ramen by Uber Eats when I was doing my task in work from home. But it's no good in the middle way of my task. So, after working, as substitute of Billy Ramen, I reserved to buy equity of Canon with 3000 yen. Even if by it, I become a bit satisfied, and I can contribute prosperity of canon and society. In this way, I've bought equity such as Ajinomoto, Canon and so on, as substitute of Billy Ramen. But until when will my cash last? If such impulse will continue for future, should I stop to go to Ueno to watch NHK Sunday Museum 50th Exhibition?

In New Year Holiday Season, I need money variously. And to renewal the qualification of Japan Expert-Master of Health Literacy, I needed over 7,000 yen. So, I have no sufficient money to invest. In my honest opinions, I want to invest stocks more. It's also important for me to get revenue, but I contribute Japanese society by investing at first. And I also pay the tax by it. Particularly, I want to invest IT stocks, such as NTT, SoftBank Group and so on, and activate Medical DX. Recently, my money to eat and drink and drink liquor has increased. Every morning, I'm very sleepy, and often drink Monster, the energy drink. It's OK for me if I can reduce money to eat and drink. Anyway, I have to bear to pay life expense.

I have a bad habitancy, that I want to use the rest cash to invest equities and social-lending. But I decided to leave 100,000 yens as the cash. Always, I've been worried whether I can pay the paying of credit cards. In other words, I also need some cash. I made the cash by selling the stocks of ANA. But I don't know it goes well or worst. And, I have the thinking,  "Using the cash is the most meaningful. the cash is a voucher to be able to exchange the value and the cash itself has no value." Anyway, I have to collect the money to go to Germany. Anyway, I have to live by my own.

I decided to go to Germany on next Oct. And I also decided to collect 700,000 yens by next Aug. Of course, I consult Chat GPT to accomplish it. I need 70,000 yen saving every month. And I have to make ends meet of 125,000 every month. I think it's difficult but not impossible. I've invested for equity and social-lending vigorously, and I can get its dividend. In Altanabank, the social-lending site, there is merchandises for 6 months. I decided to lend this social-lending merchandise my money. For it, I'm likely to collect money for German travel easier. Can I collect 700,000 yens by next Aug?

My company is struggling to decline the revenue and have to raise the minimum payment. I want to make the productivity of my company, but before it, I have to improve my productivity. And my physical strength and resilience have decreased a far more than when I was 20s. I've consulted Chat GPT again, but the answer is how to improve productivity as a pharmacist. I charged 15000 yen to Rakuten Pay, so I have to consider my earning power and productivity more seriously. My job is that I write reports about disease and medication. Applications of my paid leave has approved easily, so I have much freedom in my company. But because of it, my payroll is a bit cheap. I recover insufficient payroll by earning money by investing. But I want more money. Eventually, the best way earning money and increase productivity is that I reduce money to eat and drink and invest instead. But I can't do it easily. I decided that the budget to eat and drink every day is 500 yen again. But until now, i...

I talked about it in the conference of developmental disorders, but I can't control my impulse very well. Such as paying for DomoAI, PixAI, and so on, eating and drinking, I can't control my such impulse. In this point, I'm very similar to Dr. Jekyll, which prefers pleasure more than usual while he's a noble doctor in public. I n my case, it's not gone well for me to save money on account of my such impulse, so I concluded, that it's better for me to earn money effectively more than saving money.     I can't suspend them if my voltage of my impulse or anger will increase more than usual. Even now, I'm likely to become mad and assault to my parents when I become angry. It would be OK if I can separate my impulse personality into one person, like Dr. Jekyll, but it's impossible. So, I have no way except earning money effectively such as investing. In this way, I've become taking pride in "the investor".     How w...